Patty Kirkland 2008 Pacific Regional CAREGiver of the Year
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While Patty Kirkland is thankful and humbled by the recognition she's received as the CAREGiver of the Year for the Pacific Region, she says she's privileged to be able to take care of her clients. "I love them and I learn from them, and they are a pleasure to be around. In so many ways it's not a job, it's my playtime and I love it."
Kirkland has been a caregiver all of her life, first for her family and then her parents, and now as a Home Instead CAREGiver in Debbie Olsen's Eugene, Ore., Franchise Office. Her motto is "life is not worth living unless there is quality," and her many ways of showing kindness and compassion add value to her clients' lives.
Since coming to Home Instead Senior Care in November 2003, Kirkland has cared for some 40 clients and provided more than 17,000 CAREGiving hours. "But what really stands out in all those hours are the small extra minutes that radiate into a lifetime of heartwarming memories and small kindnesses for clients and their families," Olsen said.
Kirkland listens to her clients, and she provides them with plenty of tender loving care. "You need to know your client," she says. "Their actions and the way they present themselves will tell you what they need." If a client is depressed, for instance, Kirkland might take her out into the sunshine for a nice long car ride and perhaps lunch.
She strives to address their mental as well as physical needs. And, she makes sure they retain a sense of independence and know they remain in control -- that she is just their hands. "They need all of the TLC they can get," Kirkland says. "Ninety percent are scared and frightened they are losing control of their independence."
Discovering what her clients need has led to some unique ways of reaching out to them. One woman, who had mental health challenges, was very despondent -- until Kirkland discovered her love of painting after asking about portraits hanging on her wall. Kirkland brought her own art supplies to the woman's home, and the two painted together.
Another time Kirkland helped a client provide homemade Christmas gifts for her family. The woman had fruit trees in her backyard that they tended. "I would make sure she was right with me through each step," Kirkland says. "She would actually smile, which was very hard for her to do with Parkinson's disease. Once in a while, she would come out with a complete sentence." The pair canned pears and peaches and made blackberry jam, then tied ribbons around the jars. Imagine her family's surprise when they were presented with the gifts at a Christmas party Kirkland hosted in the client's honor.
When the wife of one of her hospice clients became despondent following his death, the family called on Kirkland to care for their mother. Kirkland was able to instill in her another will to live by helping her discover that life was not over -- it was just different.
One person, though, stands out when Kirkland is asked about her most memorable client. Kirkland spent three years caring for Margo, 24 hours a day, four days a week. "She was in the beginning stages of Alzheimer's disease when I started working with her," Kirkland recalls. "She was my favorite, if anybody could have a favorite. I had a special bond with her. We did so many things together. She was a social butterfly."
With Kirkland's help, Margo was able to start attending church again and also to take part in its "Dinner for Eight" group. When it was Margo's turn to host, Kirkland handled the planning and preparations, and she drove Margo to the other members' homes for dinners when they entertained. Kirkland helped Margo take care of her large garden, learning from her as they cared for her beloved roses, planted in the spring and harvested in the fall. One Easter morning, Kirkland literally gave Margo the dress off her back when she admired it and wanted one like it for herself. "Since I let her wear my dress, I had to wear one of her outfits," Kirkland recalls.
Ms. M, who had been a caregiver herself, said it was difficult to accept the fact that she herself needed care. "Patty acknowledged that and made it easier for me," Ms. M said. Her first day on the job, Kirkland arrived with a red rose and a box of chocolates.
Kirkland realizes that her role as a CAREGiver also involves the family, especially with hospice patients. "So many times the family doesn't know what to expect. All of the sudden the pillar of the family is dying, and they don't know how to reach out," she says. "It's important to be able to sit down and talk with the family and let them know at any given moment what is going on and how long this stage might last."
While caring for Lou, Kirkland also helped his family overcome fear. At one point his wife was so nervous Kirkland took her into the bathroom and drew a bubble bath, complete with candles, providing a quiet and serene environment so she could calm down. Lou had been a musician, so, as his final days neared, Kirkland suggested bringing in a harpist. The whole family listened as she played, and within an hour, they had all fallen asleep. "His wife was lying next to him, and the grown children had sprawled across the foot of the bed and on the floor," Kirkland recalls. "I just sat there looking and them and I cried. That was one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen." Lou passed away later that evening, surrounded by his family.
Kirkland is able to draw on her own experiences with her parents when working with clients and their families. She cared for her mother throughout her illness, even staying with her around the clock while she was in a nursing home. She later cared for her father. Both of her parents died in her arms.
Kirkland earned her CNA license and began working in an Alzheimer's unit, leaving that job because she was stretched too thin providing care to 14 clients. She learned about Home Instead Senior Care from a neighbor. She loves the fact that the company matches CAREGivers with clients.
Kirkland is deeply spiritual, and she said that, without God's help, she couldn't do what she does. Working with the elderly provides her with mentors, something she missed after her parents' deaths. "I admire them (the elderly) and all the things they have done throughout their lives."
Her advice to family members taking on the care of loved ones is to not take away their independence. "Let them feel, even if they are not, that they are in control," she says. "And listen with the heart, and not with the head."
It's advice she herself takes to heart. "Patty keeps on giving and giving and giving," said Olsen. "There is no bottom to her endless love, compassion and commitment. She continues to amaze us with creative ways to pack every day with joy and thoughtfulness.